How to Encourage a Woman to Fall in Love with You?

Edited by Jay Blaze, Josh Hannah, Jack Herrick, Versageek and 59 others

If you genuinely love and care about a woman, and want to be sure the feelings are reciprocated, you can try to get a woman to fall in love with you using the following steps. Although these are generalizations, and personalizing your actions according to your girlfriend's or crush's tastes is always the best bet, these hints should help give you some ideas to begin winning her heart.

Part 1 of 3: Starting Off

1. Make her notice you. Do something that will make her take notice of you. Many women want a man who is strong but compassionate, who leads but listens, who is confident without being cocky. Remember this as you begin to get yourself noticed. 
2. Take your time. These things take time. Don't expect to win her heart in a matter of days. Slow but steady wins the race. Set realistic expectations so that you're not disappointed if she doesn't fall for you immediately.
   
   3.Form a game-plan. No, it doesn't need to be written down, and it doesn't need to involve little x's and o's on a whiteboard. Be strategic about what you do and you'll give yourself a better chance of winning a girl's heart. Be amateurish and you'll likely lower your chances.
   
   
3. 
   Make the effort to get to know her. Really find out who she is, what she stands for, where she's coming from. She will appreciate your interest in what makes her tick.
   • People love talking about themselves. This is just the way things are. Don't forget to engage in conversation and give her information about yourself, but get her engaged in something she likes talking about and you'll find it's a lot easier going.
     
     • One way to do this is to ask great questions. Ask about her passions ("What do you love to do?"), her inspirations ("What makes you tick?"), and her goals ("What do you want to achieve?"), for example.
4. Look your best. Whereas you may not care that much what you look like, women definitely do. It's not so much the clothes and the hygiene that's important; it's the message you send the rest of the world — that you take care of yourself, that you know your style, and that you're confident.

Part 2 of 3: Hinting At Love

1.  
   Compliment her every once in a while. Remember though, guys, that a little goes a long way when it comes to compliments. You want to compliment her just enough so that she knows you like her more than a friend, but not so much that she thinks you're desperate or fishing for compliments in return.
   • Compliment her skills and abilities first and foremost. She was born with her looks, but she worked for her smarts and her talents. Compliment her when her wonderful personality shines through.
   • If you want to compliment her looks, stay away from complimenting her more feminine areas. Instead, stick to complimenting the following items:
     
     • Eyes. Ex: "Your eyes are lovely. Do your parents also have blue eyes?"
     • Hair. Ex: "Did you get a haircut? Short hair looks so good on you."
     • Smile. Ex: "You have such an infectious smile! Every time you smile I can't help smiling myself."
     • Clothes. Ex: "That's a pretty dress; did you make it yourself?"
     • General style. Ex: "Your style is so unique. You really march to the beat of your own drum."
   • Work a few really awesome compliments into your conversation, and you'll at least have her attention:
     
     • "It's so easy talking to you. I feel like I could talk to you all day long." Women want to be interesting as well as pretty.
     • "I like the way you think." If she's not the sharpest tool in the shed (and she knows it), telling her she's smart could backfire. This compliment says basically the same thing without the baggage.
     • "It took a lot of courage for you to speak up like that." Women are very principled, and want men to notice their bravery, even if it's a different brand.
2. Gain her trust. You don't necessarily have to be her best friend, but show her why she deserves to trust you. Be there when she needs you. If she asks you to keep a secret, keep it. If you say you'll do something, follow through.
3. Get her a small gift that she would like. Give her a token of your feelings. Maybe she would like some flowers or a pretty bookmark. If you don't know what she would like, try and figure it out. Here are some meanings women might attribute to various objects--
   • Ring — Commitment. You want your bond to last as long as the ring does.
   • Hand-Drawn Portrait — Inspiration. She is your inspiration; she makes you feel creative.
   • Stuffed toy — Puppy Love. You'd love an excuse to get to cuddle with her.
   • Flowers — Beauty. You think she's pretty and you want the whole world to know.
4. 
   
   
   4.Start flirting. Find a way to gently start flirting with her. It's going to be hard at first, because you really, really like her, but it will get a lot easier as you begin to establish routines and get to know her better.
   • Break the touch barrier. Touching her gently in safe, non-threatening places is key here. Avoid touching her on the thighs, stomach, breasts, and neck. Instead, when you talk to her, occasionally:
     
     • Touch the back of her hand. You're making a point and you want to reinforce it with some physical contact.
     • Touch the top of her arm. You know her a little better and you're giving her some encouragement.
     • Touch her back. You're playfully teasing her or making her feel better.
   • Smile and maintain good eye contact. A girl can tell a lot about how interested you are just by looking at your eyes. Likewise, a smile is just as important. Smile so that you project happiness, and have good eye contact so that you project confidence.
   • Develop inside jokes or learn to playfully tease. Inside jokes are a great way to flirt and bond at the same time. They are conspiratorial, meaning that you both feel you are in on something together, and it's just you. Make an inside joke out of pretty much anything that you two experience together.
5. Be mysterious but still available. Women love guys who have a little bit of mystery tied up in their persona. It doesn't take much to develop — don't share every detail, don't brag about the things you do, get other people to like (and vouch for) you — but it's hard to do correctly. At the same time, make yourself available to her. There's nothing worse than putting in all that hard work only to leave her hanging because you can no longer be found.

Part 3 of 3: Making the Final Push

1. Meet and impress her friends. Women often want their friends to approve of their romantic interests, both as a natural vetting process and a way to show off how lucky they are. Getting the approval of her friends is therefore key. Don't skip this step! 
2. 
   Ask her on a date. Once you're ready to make the final push, you need to ask her out on a date. A date will be the perfect opportunity for you two to learn more about each other, and perhaps to even steal a kiss.
   • When you ask her, keep it casual. Just ask, "Hey, I have a couple tickets to [a movie that just came out], are you free on Friday night?" You don't have to call it a date for it to be a date. If she asks, however, be confident and tell her it's a date.
   • Do something that's exciting. An exciting date — such as a haunted house, a theme park with rollercoasters, or a sports event — helps release a powerful hormone (called oxytocin) that's responsible for feelings of bonding and togetherness.
   • If it's the right moment, go in for a kiss. If you feel like she's a little hesitant, it's best to keep the kiss for the second or third date. Keep the kiss short and sweet, and whatever you do, don't try to shove your tongue down her throat.
3. Move at her pace. If she's ready to be thrown into a whirlwind romance, then by all means, roll with it. Chances are, however, that she'll want to take the relationship slower than you will. This is mostly a test of how patient you are for her and with her.
   • Don't push her into anything she's uncomfortable with. It sounds funny to say, but you'll be a lot more successful listening to her wishes and not forcing anything.
4.  
   Recover from your mistakes. In a relationship and dating, you're going to make mistakes. It's how you recover from your mistakes that defines you, and gives the woman a chance to truly love you.
   • Don't be afraid to say sorry or admit fault. When you make a mistake, man up and say "Hey, I'm sorry; I shouldn't have said that. Don't let me get away with that next time." Contrary to popular belief, it is manly to admit being wrong, because it takes a lot of guts.
   • It's generally a good idea to let her win the argument, especially if she's really invested. Don't back down if you really believe it, and don't let her constantly push you around, but try to find a way to resolve the argument with her feeling good about it. You'll be happy you did!
5. Be the person you want to be. Ultimately, you have to show her who you are in your soul, at your very deepest, to give her the chance to love you. If you pretend to be someone else, she's only going to love a caricature of you. So don't be afraid to let down your barriers, get a little vulnerable, and show her who you really are. Chances are she'll love you for it.