How to Encourage a Woman to Fall in Love with You?

Edited by Jay Blaze, Josh Hannah, Jack Herrick, Versageek and 59 others

If you genuinely love and care about a woman, and want to be sure the feelings are reciprocated, you can try to get a woman to fall in love with you using the following steps. Although these are generalizations, and personalizing your actions according to your girlfriend's or crush's tastes is always the best bet, these hints should help give you some ideas to begin winning her heart.

Part 1 of 3: Starting Off

1. Make her notice you. Do something that will make her take notice of you. Many women want a man who is strong but compassionate, who leads but listens, who is confident without being cocky. Remember this as you begin to get yourself noticed. 
2. Take your time. These things take time. Don't expect to win her heart in a matter of days. Slow but steady wins the race. Set realistic expectations so that you're not disappointed if she doesn't fall for you immediately.
   
   3.Form a game-plan. No, it doesn't need to be written down, and it doesn't need to involve little x's and o's on a whiteboard. Be strategic about what you do and you'll give yourself a better chance of winning a girl's heart. Be amateurish and you'll likely lower your chances.
   
   
3. 
   Make the effort to get to know her. Really find out who she is, what she stands for, where she's coming from. She will appreciate your interest in what makes her tick.
   • People love talking about themselves. This is just the way things are. Don't forget to engage in conversation and give her information about yourself, but get her engaged in something she likes talking about and you'll find it's a lot easier going.
     
     • One way to do this is to ask great questions. Ask about her passions ("What do you love to do?"), her inspirations ("What makes you tick?"), and her goals ("What do you want to achieve?"), for example.
4. Look your best. Whereas you may not care that much what you look like, women definitely do. It's not so much the clothes and the hygiene that's important; it's the message you send the rest of the world — that you take care of yourself, that you know your style, and that you're confident.

Part 2 of 3: Hinting At Love

1.  
   Compliment her every once in a while. Remember though, guys, that a little goes a long way when it comes to compliments. You want to compliment her just enough so that she knows you like her more than a friend, but not so much that she thinks you're desperate or fishing for compliments in return.
   • Compliment her skills and abilities first and foremost. She was born with her looks, but she worked for her smarts and her talents. Compliment her when her wonderful personality shines through.
   • If you want to compliment her looks, stay away from complimenting her more feminine areas. Instead, stick to complimenting the following items:
     
     • Eyes. Ex: "Your eyes are lovely. Do your parents also have blue eyes?"
     • Hair. Ex: "Did you get a haircut? Short hair looks so good on you."
     • Smile. Ex: "You have such an infectious smile! Every time you smile I can't help smiling myself."
     • Clothes. Ex: "That's a pretty dress; did you make it yourself?"
     • General style. Ex: "Your style is so unique. You really march to the beat of your own drum."
   • Work a few really awesome compliments into your conversation, and you'll at least have her attention:
     
     • "It's so easy talking to you. I feel like I could talk to you all day long." Women want to be interesting as well as pretty.
     • "I like the way you think." If she's not the sharpest tool in the shed (and she knows it), telling her she's smart could backfire. This compliment says basically the same thing without the baggage.
     • "It took a lot of courage for you to speak up like that." Women are very principled, and want men to notice their bravery, even if it's a different brand.
2. Gain her trust. You don't necessarily have to be her best friend, but show her why she deserves to trust you. Be there when she needs you. If she asks you to keep a secret, keep it. If you say you'll do something, follow through.
3. Get her a small gift that she would like. Give her a token of your feelings. Maybe she would like some flowers or a pretty bookmark. If you don't know what she would like, try and figure it out. Here are some meanings women might attribute to various objects--
   • Ring — Commitment. You want your bond to last as long as the ring does.
   • Hand-Drawn Portrait — Inspiration. She is your inspiration; she makes you feel creative.
   • Stuffed toy — Puppy Love. You'd love an excuse to get to cuddle with her.
   • Flowers — Beauty. You think she's pretty and you want the whole world to know.
4. 
   
   
   4.Start flirting. Find a way to gently start flirting with her. It's going to be hard at first, because you really, really like her, but it will get a lot easier as you begin to establish routines and get to know her better.
   • Break the touch barrier. Touching her gently in safe, non-threatening places is key here. Avoid touching her on the thighs, stomach, breasts, and neck. Instead, when you talk to her, occasionally:
     
     • Touch the back of her hand. You're making a point and you want to reinforce it with some physical contact.
     • Touch the top of her arm. You know her a little better and you're giving her some encouragement.
     • Touch her back. You're playfully teasing her or making her feel better.
   • Smile and maintain good eye contact. A girl can tell a lot about how interested you are just by looking at your eyes. Likewise, a smile is just as important. Smile so that you project happiness, and have good eye contact so that you project confidence.
   • Develop inside jokes or learn to playfully tease. Inside jokes are a great way to flirt and bond at the same time. They are conspiratorial, meaning that you both feel you are in on something together, and it's just you. Make an inside joke out of pretty much anything that you two experience together.
5. Be mysterious but still available. Women love guys who have a little bit of mystery tied up in their persona. It doesn't take much to develop — don't share every detail, don't brag about the things you do, get other people to like (and vouch for) you — but it's hard to do correctly. At the same time, make yourself available to her. There's nothing worse than putting in all that hard work only to leave her hanging because you can no longer be found.

Part 3 of 3: Making the Final Push

1. Meet and impress her friends. Women often want their friends to approve of their romantic interests, both as a natural vetting process and a way to show off how lucky they are. Getting the approval of her friends is therefore key. Don't skip this step! 
2. 
   Ask her on a date. Once you're ready to make the final push, you need to ask her out on a date. A date will be the perfect opportunity for you two to learn more about each other, and perhaps to even steal a kiss.
   • When you ask her, keep it casual. Just ask, "Hey, I have a couple tickets to [a movie that just came out], are you free on Friday night?" You don't have to call it a date for it to be a date. If she asks, however, be confident and tell her it's a date.
   • Do something that's exciting. An exciting date — such as a haunted house, a theme park with rollercoasters, or a sports event — helps release a powerful hormone (called oxytocin) that's responsible for feelings of bonding and togetherness.
   • If it's the right moment, go in for a kiss. If you feel like she's a little hesitant, it's best to keep the kiss for the second or third date. Keep the kiss short and sweet, and whatever you do, don't try to shove your tongue down her throat.
3. Move at her pace. If she's ready to be thrown into a whirlwind romance, then by all means, roll with it. Chances are, however, that she'll want to take the relationship slower than you will. This is mostly a test of how patient you are for her and with her.
   • Don't push her into anything she's uncomfortable with. It sounds funny to say, but you'll be a lot more successful listening to her wishes and not forcing anything.
4.  
   Recover from your mistakes. In a relationship and dating, you're going to make mistakes. It's how you recover from your mistakes that defines you, and gives the woman a chance to truly love you.
   • Don't be afraid to say sorry or admit fault. When you make a mistake, man up and say "Hey, I'm sorry; I shouldn't have said that. Don't let me get away with that next time." Contrary to popular belief, it is manly to admit being wrong, because it takes a lot of guts.
   • It's generally a good idea to let her win the argument, especially if she's really invested. Don't back down if you really believe it, and don't let her constantly push you around, but try to find a way to resolve the argument with her feeling good about it. You'll be happy you did!
5. Be the person you want to be. Ultimately, you have to show her who you are in your soul, at your very deepest, to give her the chance to love you. If you pretend to be someone else, she's only going to love a caricature of you. So don't be afraid to let down your barriers, get a little vulnerable, and show her who you really are. Chances are she'll love you for it.

Love is not all you need in a marriage

 

There are three keys to an enduring relationship. Love may be important, but communication, respect and trust are essential.

 

Tim Lott: 'Trust is the hardest of all. This isn't about infidelity, but the small matters – broken promises, bad intentions, frustrated hopes.'

 

I would like to write about what makes a successful marriage, which is unfortunate, as I don't know the answer. All I know is what a working marriage looks like close up, which is a different thing. The first thing to say about "happy marriages" is that I doubt there are many of them. Very roughly, half of all marriages end in divorce.

I suspect that of those who stay together, half are hanging on because of children, money, or fear of loneliness. Some are truly and consistently happy, out of a fortunate combination of circumstance, rather than any particular brand of love or tactic. Most of the remaining marriages, I think, are not about happiness or unhappiness, but accommodation and negotiation. And I say that as half of a married couple in which both of us have probably made one another both happy and unhappy, probably in roughly equal measure. We are very different people, but then all people are very different people. And therein lies the central problem of marriage, which asks you to spend close company with one person for years on end.

My wife and I both have a very strong sense of individuality, and I like that, but it means we have our fair share of fireworks. Anyone who does not have a lot of disagreements in a marriage is probably repressing a lot of stuff, which is liable to explode sooner or later.

I have already had one marriage that did not work out (I hesitate to call it a failed marriage because it succeeded for a fair while) and this one has already lasted a lot longer, which I take as a good sign. We have the basics – we love each other – but that is just the beginning. To me, there are three keys to marriage and they are all very difficult to forge.

The first is communication, which I have written about here before and which I don't intend to go into again. Suffice to say that good communication requires practice, goodwill, determination and a considerable amount of inborn talent.

The second is respect, which in many ways is more important than love. Love comes and goes, but respect endures, and provides the space for love to flow after the ebb, which is bound to come in all long marriages sooner or later.

The third is trust. And this is the hardest of all, because if you have ever been let down – and we all have – reconstructing the trust is difficult. This isn't about infidelity, but many small matters – broken promises, bad intentions, frustrated hopes.

You have to trust, even though you have no guarantee you won't be let down, and then, if you are let down, trust again, and then again. You must keep doing this as long as you are humanly able to, and your marriage will either stand or fall on it. This requires what I call the power of "forgettory" as opposed to memory. You need to forget and forget again about any perceived hurts and mistreatment. Dragging the weight of the past behind you will drag you down in the end.

But you will never, can never, "get there", because there is nowhere to get to. A marriage is a moving process, a living thing, and if it stops being fed with these existential nutrients, it will finally expire. Complacency and laziness is what kills marriage, far more than lack of love, and that is why it is often described as hard work. But no work is ultimately more rewarding.
 

Face read your way to understanding others......

Characteristics like honesty, intelligence and reliability are major attributes that we all seek in ourselves and others. Face reading will immediately offer you valuable information about human beings. You can begin practicing face reading by observing friends, family members and work colleagues.

Face reading gives you insights into your own and others' character through an understanding of what their facial features reveal. This segment on face reading explains how to make the best impression on those around you and also how to understand the true character of others.

For example- cheeks - when too pronounced and lacking in flesh indicate autocratic and power hungry individual. This is especially so if ‘cats eyes’ are also present. Though people generally do not know it, there is a ‘sense’ of power, control and domination when we meet someone with these features. An individual with such pronounced cheekbones would need to control his or her environment - including a deal that's going down!  

Face reading is very practical and useful in sales and business applications. This is primarily what we will consider in today's presentation.

Naturally, very few people fall into "pure" type categories, but more often than not, the predominant shape will be recognizable. Experiment with "the face" and see whether you recognize any of the character traits in yourself or others....

Your Face - A  Picture Paints a Thousand Words

Face Reading?  How does your face reveal your character and how can it be used in our business and personal life?  Your soul is mirrored in your face and reveals many aspects of your character and temperament and even your relationships and future destiny.  

Letter from a Mother to a Daughter

  
 "My dear girl, the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don’t interrupt to say: “You said the same thing a minute ago”... Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. When I don’t want to take a bath, don’t be mad and don’t embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a girl? When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don’t look at me that way... remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair and dealing with life’s issues every day... the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If I ocasionally lose track of what we’re talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can’t, don’t be nervous, impatient or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. And when my old, tired legs don’t let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. When those days come, don’t feel sad... just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I’ll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I’ve always had for you, I just want to say, I love you... my darling daughter."

By: Spring in the Air

Personality Test

Personality Test.

Personality Test.

Look at the tree and choose the one that is immediately most appealing to you.

Don’t think about it too long, just choose, and find out

what your choice says about your personality. write down your choice in the comments.

The results!

1. You are a generous and moral (not to confuse with moralizing) person. You always work on self-improvement. You are very ambitious and have very high standards. People might think that communicating with you is difficult, but for you, it isn’t easy to be who you are. You work very hard but you are not in the least selfish. You work because you want to improve the world. You have a great capacity to love people until they hurt you. But even after they do. . . you keep loving. Very few people can appreciate everything you do as well as you deserve.

2. You are a fun, honest person. You are very responsible and like taking care of others. You believe in putting in an honest day’s work and accept many work-related responsibilities. You have a very good personality and people come to trust you easily. You are bright, witty and fast-thinking. You always have an interesting story to tell.

3.You are a smart and thoughtful person. You are a great thinker. Your thoughts and ideas are the most important. You like to think about your theories and views alone. You are an introvert. You get along with those who likes to think and learn. You spend a lot of time, thinking about morality. You are trying to do what is right, even if the majority of society does not agree with you.

4. You are perceptive and philosophical person. You are a unique, one soul of your kind. Next to you there’s no one even slightly similar to you. You are intuitive and a bit quirky. You are often misunderstood, and it hurts you. You need personal space. Your creativity needs to be developed, it requires respect of others. You are a person who clearly sees the light and dark sides of life. You are very emotional.

5. You are self-assured and in charge. You are very independent. Your guiding principle in life is ‘I’ll do it my way.’. You are very self-reliant and know how to stay strong for yourself and the people you love. You know exactly what you want and are not afraid of pursuing your dreams. The only thing you demand from people is honesty. You are strong enough to accept the truth.

6. You are kind and sensitive. People relate to you very well. You have many friends and you love helping them. You have this warm and bright aura that makes people feel good when they are around you. Every day, you think about what you can do to improve yourself. You want to be interesting, insightful and unique. More than anybody else in the world, you need to love. You are even ready to love those who don’t love you back.

7. You are happy and unflappable. You are a very sensitive and understanding person. You are a great listener who know how to be non-judgmental. You believe that everybody has their own journey in life. You are open to new people and events. You are highly resistant to stress and rarely worry. Normally, you are very relaxed. You always manage to have a good time and never lose your way.

8. You are charming and energetic. You are a fun person who knows hot to make people laugh. You live in a state of harmony with the universe. You are spontaneous and enthusiastic. You never say no to an adventure. Often, you end up surprising and even shocking people. But that’s just how you are. . . You always remain true to yourself. You have many interests and if something proves of interest to you, you will not rest until you acquire a profound knowledge of this area.

9. You are optimistic and lucky. You believe that life is a gift and you try to achieve as much as possible and put this gift to the best use possible. You are very proud of your achievements. You are ready to stick by the people you care about through thick and thin. You have a very healthy approach to life. The glass is (at least) half full for you. You use any opportunity to forgive, learn, and grow because you believe that life is too short to do otherwise.

Look at the tree and choose the one that is immediately most appealing to you.

Don’t think about it too long, just choose, and find out

what your choice says about your personality. write down your choice in the comments.

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The results!

1. You are a generous and moral (not to confuse with moralizing) person. You always work on self-improvement. You are very ambitious and have very high standards. People might think that communicating with you is difficult, but for you, it isn’t easy to be who you are. You work very hard but you are not in the least selfish. You work because you want to improve the world. You have a great capacity to love people until they hurt you. But even after they do. . . you keep loving. Very few people can appreciate everything you do as well as you deserve.

2. You are a fun, honest person. You are very responsible and like taking care of others. You believe in putting in an honest day’s work and accept many work-related responsibilities. You have a very good personality and people come to trust you easily. You are bright, witty and fast-thinking. You always have an interesting story to tell.

3.You are a smart and thoughtful person. You are a great thinker. Your thoughts and ideas are the most important. You like to think about your theories and views alone. You are an introvert. You get along with those who likes to think and learn. You spend a lot of time, thinking about morality. You are trying to do what is right, even if the majority of society does not agree with you.

4. You are perceptive and philosophical person. You are a unique, one soul of your kind. Next to you there’s no one even slightly similar to you. You are intuitive and a bit quirky. You are often misunderstood, and it hurts you. You need personal space. Your creativity needs to be developed, it requires respect of others. You are a person who clearly sees the light and dark sides of life. You are very emotional.

5. You are self-assured and in charge. You are very independent. Your guiding principle in life is ‘I’ll do it my way.’. You are very self-reliant and know how to stay strong for yourself and the people you love. You know exactly what you want and are not afraid of pursuing your dreams. The only thing you demand from people is honesty. You are strong enough to accept the truth.

6. You are kind and sensitive. People relate to you very well. You have many friends and you love helping them. You have this warm and bright aura that makes people feel good when they are around you. Every day, you think about what you can do to improve yourself. You want to be interesting, insightful and unique. More than anybody else in the world, you need to love. You are even ready to love those who don’t love you back.

7. You are happy and unflappable. You are a very sensitive and understanding person. You are a great listener who know how to be non-judgmental. You believe that everybody has their own journey in life. You are open to new people and events. You are highly resistant to stress and rarely worry. Normally, you are very relaxed. You always manage to have a good time and never lose your way.

8. You are charming and energetic. You are a fun person who knows hot to make people laugh. You live in a state of harmony with the universe. You are spontaneous and enthusiastic. You never say no to an adventure. Often, you end up surprising and even shocking people. But that’s just how you are. . . You always remain true to yourself. You have many interests and if something proves of interest to you, you will not rest until you acquire a profound knowledge of this area.

9. You are optimistic and lucky. You believe that life is a gift and you try to achieve as much as possible and put this gift to the best use possible. You are very proud of your achievements. You are ready to stick by the people you care about through thick and thin. You have a very healthy approach to life. The glass is (at least) half full for you. You use any opportunity to forgive, learn, and grow because you believe that life is too short to do otherwise.

- See more at: http://www.bestenglishquotes.com/2013/12/20/personality-test/#sthash.dD7rj9qW.dpuf

Look at the tree and choose the one that is immediately most appealing to you.

Don’t think about it too long, just choose, and find out

what your choice says about your personality. write down your choice in the comments.

The results!

1. You are a generous and moral (not to confuse with moralizing) person. You always work on self-improvement. You are very ambitious and have very high standards. People might think that communicating with you is difficult, but for you, it isn’t easy to be who you are. You work very hard but you are not in the least selfish. You work because you want to improve the world. You have a great capacity to love people until they hurt you. But even after they do. . . you keep loving. Very few people can appreciate everything you do as well as you deserve.

2. You are a fun, honest person. You are very responsible and like taking care of others. You believe in putting in an honest day’s work and accept many work-related responsibilities. You have a very good personality and people come to trust you easily. You are bright, witty and fast-thinking. You always have an interesting story to tell.

3.You are a smart and thoughtful person. You are a great thinker. Your thoughts and ideas are the most important. You like to think about your theories and views alone. You are an introvert. You get along with those who likes to think and learn. You spend a lot of time, thinking about morality. You are trying to do what is right, even if the majority of society does not agree with you.

4. You are perceptive and philosophical person. You are a unique, one soul of your kind. Next to you there’s no one even slightly similar to you. You are intuitive and a bit quirky. You are often misunderstood, and it hurts you. You need personal space. Your creativity needs to be developed, it requires respect of others. You are a person who clearly sees the light and dark sides of life. You are very emotional.

5. You are self-assured and in charge. You are very independent. Your guiding principle in life is ‘I’ll do it my way.’. You are very self-reliant and know how to stay strong for yourself and the people you love. You know exactly what you want and are not afraid of pursuing your dreams. The only thing you demand from people is honesty. You are strong enough to accept the truth.

6. You are kind and sensitive. People relate to you very well. You have many friends and you love helping them. You have this warm and bright aura that makes people feel good when they are around you. Every day, you think about what you can do to improve yourself. You want to be interesting, insightful and unique. More than anybody else in the world, you need to love. You are even ready to love those who don’t love you back.

7. You are happy and unflappable. You are a very sensitive and understanding person. You are a great listener who know how to be non-judgmental. You believe that everybody has their own journey in life. You are open to new people and events. You are highly resistant to stress and rarely worry. Normally, you are very relaxed. You always manage to have a good time and never lose your way.

8. You are charming and energetic. You are a fun person who knows hot to make people laugh. You live in a state of harmony with the universe. You are spontaneous and enthusiastic. You never say no to an adventure. Often, you end up surprising and even shocking people. But that’s just how you are. . . You always remain true to yourself. You have many interests and if something proves of interest to you, you will not rest until you acquire a profound knowledge of this area.

9. You are optimistic and lucky. You believe that life is a gift and you try to achieve as much as possible and put this gift to the best use possible. You are very proud of your achievements. You are ready to stick by the people you care about through thick and thin. You have a very healthy approach to life. The glass is (at least) half full for you. You use any opportunity to forgive, learn, and grow because you believe that life is too short to do otherwise.

- See more at: http://www.bestenglishquotes.com/2013/12/20/personality-test/#sthash.dD7rj9qW.dpuf

BALANCE SHEET OF LIFE

"Our Birth is our Opening Balance!
Our Death is our Closing Balance!
Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities

Our Creative Ideas are our Assets
Heart is our Current Asset
Soul is our Fixed Asset
Brain is our Fixed Deposit

Thinking is our Current Account
Achievements are our capital.
Character & Morals, our Stock-in-Trade.

Friends are our General Reserves
Values & Behaviour are our Goodwill.
Patience is our Interest Earned.

Love is our Dividend.
Children are our Bonus Issues.
Education is Brands / Patents.

Knowledge is our Investment.
Experience is our Premium Account.
The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.

The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award."

Is it Possible to Love Anyone Forever?

As your friends and family look on, you look into your new spouse's eyes and see your loving gaze returned. The sun shines, your partner's smile radiates, and your heart wells up with profound joy and fulfillment. How wonderful it is to have found your life mate! You experience an overwhelming certainty that you will love this person forever.
But should you solemnly vow that you will do so?

The answer largely depends upon on the degree to which you can accurately forecast your future emotional states. Love is, after all, an emotion—and just like anger, despair, or euphoria, it can be insubordinate to our conscious wishes. What does the scientific literature have to say about our ability to forecast our future emotional states?
Alas, the news isn't good.

Breaking Up: Surprisingly Easy to Do 

In one recent study, we examined how accurate people are at predicting their emotional response to a romantic breakup. At study entry, the participants in our sample of college students were involved in reasonably serious romantic relationships (the average duration was over a year). They completed an online questionnaire every two weeks asking them about diverse aspects of their personal and professional lives. Embedded in each questionnaire were questions asking them to forecast how distressed they would be—two, four, eight, and 12 weeks out—if their relationship were to end within the next two weeks. Even after breaking up with their partner, they continued completing the questionnaires, which enabled us to compare their forecasted distress to their actual distress—for example, to compare the distress they predicted they would experience eight weeks after a breakup to the distress they actually experienced eight weeks after one.
On average, participants significantly overestimated how distressed they would be, and this affective forecasting bias became evident almost immediately after the breakup. In addition, those individuals who made their forecasts when they identified themselves as strongly in love with their partner were the most inaccurate—they forecasted that they would experience bottomless devastation, but they tended to pull through the breakup more-or-less okay. There were enormous discrepancies in the pre-breakup distress forecasts between those who said they were deeply in love and those who said they were not. But in reality, participants who had identified as strongly in love were only slightly more distressed following a breakup than were participants who had claimed that they were not especially in love.
To be sure, breaking up is not fun; we don't recommend it for weekend entertainment. The results of our study suggest, however, that most people find the distress of a breakup to be significantly less painful than they anticipated, especially if they were strongly in love with their partner when making the forecast.

Should You Vow?
What does this affective forecasting research have to do with the vows we should make on our wedding day? It suggests that we should be wary of making promises about our future emotional states. Of course, since "We'll see how it goes" does not make for compelling matrimonial theater, you should instead consider all the things you can promise that do happen to be in your control. For example, you can promise that you will always strive to treat your spouse with decency and respect, even when you are angry. Or you can promise that you will never engage in an extramarital sexual liaison. These things, and many others that are essential to long-term relationship well-being, are under your control.
But can you solemnly vow that you will experience love for your partner not only tomorrow, but also 20 or even 50 years from now? There's a decent chance that you really will love your spouse until death do you part, but promising that you will do so seems dangerous, especially if you're the sort of person who takes solemn vows seriously.

Why Does Love Hurt?

Many people believe that love is a sensation that generates when Mr. or Mrs. right appears.... no wonder so many people are single. Many people approach a relationship either consciously or unconsciously, they believe love is a sensation based on physical and emotional attraction that magically/spontaneously generates when that special person appears. And just as easily, it can spontaneously degenerate when the magic just isn't there anymore. You fall in love, and you can fall out of love. The key word is passivity. The sad consequence of this misconception is: "There is hardly any activity, any enterprise, which is started with such tremendous hopes and expectations and yet, which fails so regularly, as love." Love is the attachment that results in deeply appreciating another's goodness. See what we value most in ourselves, we value most in others.

 

 

God created us to see ourselves as good (hence our need to either rationalize or regret our wrongdoings). So, we seek goodness in others. Nice looks, an engaging personality, intelligence and talent (all of which counts for something) may attract you, but goodness is what moves you to love. Trust Me! If that person doesn't see the same goodness in you, love is not possible because it really takes two to love. I like to say give and receive. Remember a person can't love if they don't want to be loved. Love is a choice, if love comes from appreciating goodness, it needn't just happen--you can make it happen, love is active. You can create it. Just focus on the good in another. If you can do this easily you'll love easily but will be venerable to a lot of fake love in return and also pain. Obviously, there is a far distance between personal love and unconditional love. See unconditional love is rooted from within.... only a person who captures your true love will receive it...because you see the true goodness in them. Actions affect feelings. How can you deepen your love for someone? Actions affect our feelings the most. If you want to become more compassionate, thinking compassionate thoughts will be a start. Giving ultimately is the key. While most people think that love leads to giving.... the truth is actually the total opposite, giving leads to love. The first action of giving is care, demonstrating the active concern for a person’s life and growth. The second is responsibility, responding to their expressed and unexpressed needs, esp. emotional needs. The third is respect, the ability to see a person as they really are, to be aware of their unique individuality and consequently, wanting that person to grow and unfold as they are. These three actions all depend on the fourth, knowledge. You can care for, respond to, and respect another only as deeply as you know them. The effect of genuine giving is profound. It allows you into another person’s world and opens you up to receiving their goodness. At the same time, it means investing a part of yourself in the other, enabling to love that person as you love yourself. In conclusion love is also a behavior, a relationship thrives when two partners are committed to behaving lovingly through continual, unconditional giving-- not only saying, "I love you" but showing it! See, in the end love is really overrated and inexplicable. People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a Godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that your need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. 

 

The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on. Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season! LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant. Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.