How to Detect a Bad Friendship ?
by Kristen Moutria, Demand MediaFulfilling friendships can be an inspiration and a source of strength during difficult times. You share your heart and become vulnerable with those you trust and, in turn, you gain a sense of being loved and understood. The Mayo Clinic reports that good friendships can help reduce your stress, improve your sense of self-worth, help you cope with trauma and encourage you to change unhealthy habits. But what can you do when a particular friend always leaves you feeling drained? You might want to step back and see if you recognize the signs of a bad friendship.
Step 1
Ask
yourself if you feel true to who you are when you are around your
friend. Do you like the way you are behaving, or do you feel out of
place? Dr. Andrea Bonior reports that if you are experiencing feelings of aggression, resentment,
envy or competitiveness, and you do not feel these things around your
other friends, it may be time to move on. These feelings signify that
there is not a healthy foundation to your relationship.
Step 2
Take note of the way you talk about yourself when you are with your friend. In a 2010 article in "Glamour," Sarah Jio shares
her experience with a friend who compelled her to brag about herself.
Jio came to the conclusion that this particular friend made her feel
inferior, and that Jio tried to make up for her lack of confidence by
constantly drawing attention back to herself. A real friend will not make you feel incompetent; if you feel the need to brag in front of your friend, you may not have a healthy relationship.
Step 3
Analyze your
relationships with other friends. Does this particular friend keep you
from spending time with others? If so, you may need to cut ties with
him. Dr. Ramani Durvasula states that one sign of an unhealthy
friendship is isolation from other people who are important to you. One
friend who demands all your time and energy may be manipulating you into
focusing your attention on him, instead of having balance in your life
and spending time with a variety of people.
Step 4
Determine if you
feel misunderstood.Dr. Bonior explains that the
signs of feeling unaccepted by a friend include censoring yourself
around her or experiencing embarrassment for something you have no need
to feel bad about. Bonior points out that this is the opposite of unconditional love,
and not a good foundation for a healthy friendship. Instead of
remaining friends with the person who makes you feel this way, try to
find a friend who believes in kindness and respect and will give you the
love and attention you deserve.
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